By Alpa Dharamshi
The lady was very beautiful looking and had long hair almost touching her knees. I couldn’t resist myself, but my eyes immediately saw her beautiful black and silky hair. She looked very disturbed. She entered our Counselling room almost 10 months back at one of the government hospitals where I volunteer at the department of Oncology.
She had come with her husband. Both were sweating profusely. I made them comfortable. They mentioned that the oncologist had sent them to me for counselling. I told them that they are free to share whatever is bothering them. I assured them of complete confidentiality.
After a few minutes, the husband opened up. He said madam can you understand sign language? I said yes. His expressions changed completely. There was a great relief in his face as well as his beloved. He mentioned that his better half was deaf and mute. He said it’s been over a month and we are running from pillar to post. No one in this hospital understands what my wife has to share. She has mixed emotions and confusions going on in her mind. He also mentioned about her diagnosis and the treatment suggested. He wanted me to speak to her. I readily agreed.
Immediately I started conversation with her in sign language. In few moments there was change in her expressions. She opened up and after a while she had a huge relief. The husband was very happy and relieved. He was very thankful that there is someone who understands her completely, her thoughts and her feelings. He said, “Every time I see a doctor, I need to translate to her and vice versa. I am so thankful she could open up before you and I am very much relieved.’
There were good and bad days as well. But every time she came to the hospital, she ensured to come and see me before she started her treatment for the day. I was sad to see that her beautiful long and silky hair was lost in the process of treatment. But she was coping well.
Things took a bad turn for her. Slowly for the last two months her health deteriorated and she was under palliative care. She was unable to move around and the disease had taken a toll on her health. Her husband regularly updated me about her health.
Now whenever she is in hospital, I make it a point to go and see her and also talk to her. There is hardly anyone who can communicate with her at the hospital. I make sure I spend quality time with her and make her feel comfortable. She would speak her heart out with her actions and signs.
Last week her husband called me to inform that her eyesight too has been damaged due to the disease. The family is finding it very hard to communicate with her. I feel very sad for her and her family. As a counsellor I can only understand and empathize with her and her family. I can only hear them out. Because of her poor vision, she was unable to see me over the video call. ‘May God give her the strength to overcome her pain’, I kept praying.
Her husband called me to inform about her demise. She passed away peacefully in sleep. He said he was feeling so helpless. He couldn’t communicate with her towards the end. She mentioned that she wanted to live more and get her children married. I just heard him out. He spoke for more than 40 minutes and poured his heart out.
She has and will have a special place in my memories for life ❤️
#Counsellor Life
#Cancer Counselling
#Volunteering
#Speciallyabled Counselling
#Palliative Counselling
#Palliative Care
#Caregiver Counselling
#End of Life Counselling
#Dignified Death
#Bereavement Counselling
